When it comes to engaging customers and employees, I’ve found that most businesses are missing a crucial insight: engagement isn’t about transactions—it’s about creating transformational experiences.
Recently, I had the opportunity to interview my longtime friend Steve Spangler for my podcast. Steve has just written a book called “The Engagement Effect: Cultivating Experiences That Ignite Connection, Build Trust, and Inspire Action.” During our conversation, he shared a concept that resonated deeply with me—the “Best Day Ever” experience.
This idea isn’t just another customer service tactic. It’s a fundamental shift in how we think about business relationships.
The Power of Transformational Experiences
Steve shared a story from his teaching days that perfectly captures this concept. As a science teacher, he created a Halloween science show for his students with exploding pumpkins and other dramatic demonstrations. The next day, a student’s father approached him, knowing every detail of what happened in class.
Why? Because his daughter couldn’t stop talking about it at dinner. She called it “the best day ever.”
What struck me about this story wasn’t just the spectacular science demonstrations. It was that when Steve asked the student later what made it the “best day ever,” she mentioned an activity he hadn’t even led—a simple marshmallow and toothpick building exercise another teacher conducted afterward.
As Steve put it: “If what you did was not just an activity but created an experience, it’s transformational. It changes the way you see, feel, think, and react.”
The principal’s wisdom in this situation was profound: “If it gets to the dinner table, you win.” When customers or employees are so moved by an experience that they share it with others, you’ve created something truly valuable.
Engagement Is a Two-Way Conversation
What many business leaders miss is that engagement isn’t one-sided. It’s a conversation—a two-way street. When we try to control every aspect of the customer or employee experience, we limit its potential.
Steve’s approach with his own business was instructive. His company maintained an average employee retention of 11 years—almost unheard of in today’s business environment. How? By treating employees similar to how he treated students in the classroom:
- Creating a culture where experimentation was encouraged
- Not pretending to have all the answers
- Listening to feedback and acting on it
- Allowing employees to help shape the direction
This approach created an environment where employees felt valued and engaged. They weren’t just following orders—they were part of creating something meaningful.
The Chewy.com Example
One of the most powerful examples of creating a “Best Day Ever” experience comes from Chewy.com. A customer called to cancel his subscription after his dog passed away. The Chewy representative didn’t just process the cancellation—she asked about his dog, refunded his money, suggested he donate the remaining food, and then sent flowers with a note expressing condolences for losing his “best friend.”
This story demonstrates several key principles:
- They focused on the human connection, not the transaction
- They showed genuine empathy rather than following a script
- They went beyond expectations in a meaningful (not gimmicky) way
- They created a story worth sharing—we’re still talking about it years later
The representative wasn’t following a rigid protocol. She was empowered to create a meaningful connection with the customer. That’s the engagement effect in action.
How to Create Your Own “Best Day Ever” Experiences
So how can you apply this in your business? Start by recognizing that engagement is an experiment. There are no hard and fast rules. It’s about creating experiences where people want to connect with you.
Look for opportunities to:
- Ignite emotional connections, not just rational ones
- Step back and let your team members shine (like Johnny Carson did with his guests)
- Allow customers to help craft their own experiences
- Identify what has created “best day ever” moments in the past and find ways to replicate them
When you create these transformational experiences, they don’t just impact the moment—they can resonate for years. People will still be talking about them a decade later, just as we’re still talking about that Chewy.com story.
The most powerful insight I’ve gained from my conversation with Steve is that true engagement isn’t about getting employees to work harder or customers to buy more. It’s about creating experiences where people genuinely want to connect with you. When you achieve that, everything else follows naturally.
Remember: engagement is an experiment. Don’t be afraid to try new approaches, adjust based on feedback, and even fail occasionally. The businesses that create the most meaningful connections are those willing to take risks in service of creating those “Best Day Ever” moments.
