I’ve noticed a dangerous pattern in many people’s lives – including my own at times. When we don’t get what we want fast enough, negative thoughts start creeping in. These “bad voices” in our heads grow louder and more persistent the longer we go without achieving our desired outcomes. And here’s the real problem: these voices don’t just stay as thoughts – they transform into actions.
The longer we listen to these negative internal dialogues, the more likely we are to make poor decisions. It’s a downward spiral that can be difficult to escape. Bad voices inevitably lead to bad choices. This simple but powerful truth has shaped my approach to personal development and success.
The Power of Positive Internal Dialogue
On the flip side, I’ve discovered that cultivating positive internal dialogue creates a foundation for better decision-making. Good voices create good choices. This isn’t just motivational talk – it’s a practical reality I’ve witnessed in my own life and in the lives of countless entrepreneurs and athletes I’ve coached.
When we fill our minds with constructive thoughts, encouragement, and realistic optimism, we naturally gravitate toward actions that serve our highest good. The quality of our internal conversation directly impacts the quality of our decisions.
This is why I’m so passionate about focusing on behaviors rather than outcomes. What we do consistently matters far more than what we achieve occasionally.
Non-Negotiable Behaviors: The Foundation of Success
I’ve built my coaching philosophy around the concept of non-negotiable behaviors – those positive actions we commit to regardless of circumstances or feelings. These aren’t just random good habits; they’re strategic behaviors aligned with our values and goals.
The magic of good behaviors is that they:
- Aggregate – they build upon each other, creating momentum
- Accelerate – they speed up our progress toward our goals
In contrast, negative behaviors do the opposite – they interfere with our progress and potential. Every minute spent engaging in counterproductive actions is a minute lost from our growth.
I’ve found that the most successful people aren’t necessarily the most talented or privileged. They’re the ones who consistently engage in positive behaviors while minimizing negative ones.
Protecting Your Infinite Potential
We all have tremendous untapped potential within us. I truly believe this potential is infinite – but only if we protect it from the interference of negative thoughts and behaviors.
The less time I spend on bad behaviors, the less I interfere with my potential. This simple principle has transformed my approach to personal development and the way I coach others.
Instead of trying to eliminate every negative thought or behavior (which can become its own obsession), I focus on crowding them out with positive ones. When we fill our lives with constructive actions and thoughts, there’s simply less room for the negative ones to take hold.
Breaking the Cycle
If you find yourself caught in a cycle of negative thinking and poor choices, here’s my advice:
- Recognize the pattern – notice when bad voices are influencing your decisions
- Interrupt the cycle with a positive, non-negotiable behavior
- Build a “good voice” practice through meditation, affirmations, or positive self-talk
- Surround yourself with people who reinforce positive thinking
Breaking this cycle isn’t about perfection. It’s about progress – gradually shifting the balance from negative to positive, from interference to acceleration.
The journey toward success isn’t linear. There will be setbacks and challenges. But by cultivating good voices and committing to positive, non-negotiable behaviors, we can navigate these challenges without falling into destructive patterns.
Remember, what you tell yourself matters. The voices you listen to shape the choices you make, and those choices determine the life you live. Choose wisely.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How can I identify my “bad voices” when they might feel normal to me?
Bad voices typically manifest as self-doubt, excessive criticism, catastrophizing, or defeatist thinking. Pay attention to thoughts that make you feel discouraged, anxious, or that lead you to give up. These voices often use absolutes like “never,” “always,” or “impossible.” Start by simply noticing when your thinking turns negative without judging yourself for it.
Q: What are examples of non-negotiable behaviors that can help create “good voices”?
Non-negotiable behaviors vary by individual, but effective examples include daily meditation, journaling positive experiences, regular exercise, reading personal development material, practicing gratitude, and connecting with supportive people. The key is consistency – these behaviors should happen regardless of mood or circumstances.
Q: How long does it take to break the cycle of bad voices and bad choices?
This varies widely depending on how entrenched your patterns are. Some people notice improvements within weeks, while deeper patterns might take months to shift significantly. The important thing isn’t speed but direction – as long as you’re moving toward more positive internal dialogue and better choices, you’re on the right path.
Q: What if external circumstances make it difficult to maintain positive thinking?
Challenging circumstances can certainly make positive thinking harder, but this is precisely when good voices are most crucial. Focus on what you can control rather than what you can’t. Even in difficult situations, you can control your response, your focus, and your daily behaviors. Sometimes the most powerful good voice is simply saying, “This is temporary, and I’m doing what I can with what I have.”
Q: Can professional help be necessary to change negative thought patterns?
Absolutely. While many people can shift their thinking through self-directed practices, some negative thought patterns are deeply rooted or connected to trauma, anxiety, or depression. Working with a therapist, coach, or counselor can provide valuable tools and support for changing these patterns. Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
